New Years Eve - Bugger off Jools Holland!

I’ve never fully understood the celebrations of New Years Eve. Don’t get me wrong, crossing arms and singing Auld Lang Syne is an absolute highlight, but what is it exactly that we’re celebrating? Christmas is over, the cold darkness of January looms, everyone is slightly damaged by Boxing Day sales and humoured resolutions are always forgotten by February. Taxi’s are twice the price, clubs are twice as lame, Jools Holland mocks us with his banging party on the BBC. House parties are like any other, except fireworks are on the telly in the background. 

Alright Jools, no need to look so smug. Yes we are all jealous.

Opening my eyes on January 1^st in a tangled sea of bodies, I’ll heave slightly amongst the empty bottles and the dried vomit in the corner trying to ignore the complete stranger weeing in a cupboard and pretending that I haven’t got de ja vu from this time last year. 

I remember New Years Eve of 1999, now that was exciting, no-one knew just what would happen as we entered a new millennium, was the world going to end? Computers explode? What about the banks? Cancelled debts and a new world - a utopia of equality loomed! My Mum bought me a millennium time capsule with some questions inside, one being:

 ‘What will the world be like in 10 years?’

My answer as a 9 year old was that I would be at university and phones would have screens so that you could speak to people and see them at the same time.

That New Year was as predictable as my answer.

Maybe I shan’t have a drink this year. I will think long and hard about which resolution to make and stick to for the coming year - the year in which I shall (hopefully) graduate. I will get an early night and perhaps start that essay I’ve been putting off, treat myself to a nice bath...

Or, I will go to a house party, have a little tipple, mumble incoherent babblings to the tune of Auld Lang Syne, bitch with loved ones at the smug couples snogging at twelve, declare my undying love for everyone I know in a drunken stupor before nodding off in a haze as the birds start singing outside.

2011 saw us waving goodbye to Amy Winehouse and Steve Jobs as well as sticking two fingers up at Gaddafi and Bin Laden. The August riots set a worrying precedent for our small island and Japan suffered a devastating earthquake. Financial districts were occupied and monarchist or not, Kate and Wills are a shoo-in for Cutest Couple of the Year Award. Some mad religious nut lead a bunch of people to think the world would end on May 21^st,, but it seems we will make it to 2012 after all. Happy New Year.